Thursday, July 31, 2014

George R R Martin look alikes

There seems to be a pretty obvious theme that has been set in the whole TWO HOURS since Castle Awesome has been back satisfying your urge to waste endless time on the Internet (we all know what you're really doing.)

And that, dear humans, is  #NOREASON


Because who needs one. Exactly.

So in the spirit of our revival I present you the following:

Fat idiots George R R Martin look alikes.

Look at this first one. I know right, just a shitty costume but he's totally got the hat and beard right look at the comparison.

Then there's this guy, just another shitty costume. I don't like his beard.

Ok, we're getting better at it now. This guy actually made the effort of stuffing his shirt, because so far people haven't really tried to imitate his obesity. Which is an issue, but I guess that's what happens if you take DECADES to write a goddamn series of books.

Lets take a brief break <-- Mandatory break viewing. Click it.


This is probably the only decent one.

He's even got that weird little hat emblem, turtle, pendent, thing, or whatever it is..

This next one I guess kinda looks like a weird version of him, but it could just be a fat dude.

If you squint like Fry you can kinda see it

Then again, I may have it all wrong. If we consult The Holy Gospel of Yahoo Answers maybe it is our rotund fantasy obsessed shut-in that looks like someone else even more famous than he


Congratulations! You've sat through a complete bullshit post that's all in the spirit of the revived Castle Awesome that is sure to bring you about as much pleasure as cross dressing Khal Drogo getting nailed in da butt by a bearded Daenerys Targaryen!



We have been going on with this silly thing (the Castle) for about 5 years now. With breaks. Lots of breaks. At least 7 breaks. One of the breaks was for a year or so. Much breaks.

Why keep going? I have no idea. For no reason at all i guess.

So we really have no reason but to continue.

Seven people will read up to here

We don't really know what we do here. So if you missed the last five years i'll bring you up to speed. We posted about a vagina music video once. There's a guy who posts about absolutely useless bullshit. We changed our url to a .com and then had it shut down losing years of posts. That's about it. This will be the first post on this incarnation of the Castle for almost two years.

That is all you missed.

Five people will read up to here

So why the fuck should you read Castle Awesome? No reason.

no reason

This is reason enough to read Castle Awesome. Here is a quick guide on the places to take advantage of this sites useless content.


  • taking a long and comforting dump
  • eating a sandwich by yourself 
  • on a bus
  • canoeing 
  • filling in time before your imminent death 
  • having to wait quite a while for food in a restaurant and the person opposite you is less interesting than learning about how to perform a rad hand shake in an obscure french film (it's totally worth watching)

Two people will have read down to here. One because they hate all of this, but have had their internet connection severed during the course of reading and this is the only site loaded on their internet browser. Sucks to be you.


  • Strange/obscure/shit/blockbuster films
  • The Dark corners of the internet
  • Memes/Trends
  • Tech
  • Triple A and indie games
  • Useless bullshit
  • Records & underground electronic music like this & this.

So please maybe like the fezbook page and get ready for something weird or mildly amusing for every bowel movement. Posts will appear in the next few days, weeks, years. 

This could be the last post ever.

If you made it this far than please accept my gratitude here.

Also this

Castle Beats

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