Thursday, June 30, 2011

Hanson, Rebecca Black, Kenny G, Corey Feldman & Katy Perry?

#hanson #rebeccablack #Katy Perry
WTF?

Before you die you must go to SLWXMS


#slwxms #soulwax #soulwaxmas

Billy Dee Williams and Colt 45

If it's good enough for Lando, it's good enough for the rest of us.



60% of the time it works every time.
Thanks Hamo for the link!

New NBC TV Series AWAKE - Trailer

#Awake #NBC

It must be getting harder and harder for Television studios to convince viewers to watch a brand new show, since people are already overloaded with solid programming, most of which lasts, on average, 8 seasons.

Today, I was convinced, by a trailer. I'm not putting all my money on it, because it is on a public US network (which means no boobies, swearing or any production values), but I have hopes that the somewhat failing network, NBC, are banking every single person's job on this show, and if this has that type of importance and urgency attached to it, it will be good.

WHY? Because a cable show can have Boobies (HBO's True Blood & Entourage), Swearing (Showtime's Dexter & Weeds), Production value (AMC's Walking Dead & Mad Men), amazing casts (Dexter & Entourage) and huge name Executive producers (Boardwalk Empire's Martin Scorsese & The Pacific's Tom Hanks and Steven Spielberg), but there is one aspect that you don't need money to buy (and some of the cable shows don't have anyways).

Story. Or simpler yet, an idea.

As much as people will say it's a made-for-tv rip off of Inception, you couldn't be more wrong. Inception, through and through, was science-fiction. Awake boast a very real human drama.

I personally have invested interest in this idea, as many people would who lost someone close to them. We have all had that feeling of waking up from a dream, that felt so real you wish you were there again. If you have been through something like this, as I have, don't be surprised if you shed a tear. Enjoy.



Awake will premiere in the US fall tv lineup, so around September.

AND THE WINNER IS -



#theoffice #jamesspader

So, I officially don't care. James Spader appeared to be the best person to replace Steve Carrel, to save a show no one really liked that much. What do you think happens?

They do just that. James Spader will be hired to fill the managers position at Dunder Miflin.

Here is the finger in yer stinker, Spader's character will feel the role is too small for him and convince the board to make him CEO, replacing a character currently played by Kathy Bates, but only on a less than frequent basis.

Sooooo....... Huh?

James Spader will be hired to replace Bates, leaving the Carrel job still open, and probably freeing up some salary from the over-paid, over-weight, over rated oscar winner, Kathy Bates.

Ouch.

Better Late than Never, or Having Dwarfism

#RickyGervais @warwickadavis


The title simply refers to the fact that this trailer has been on the webs for enough time for you to not care about it anymore.

Just be aware one thing. This show is powered by Ricky Gervais and Stephen Merchant - with them, they bring 483 awards from their previous 2 shows and an ewok.

Warwick Davis, I tease you because I'm jealous. I don't want to get into a pissing contest, but I would rather have Dwarfism and work with Ricky and Steve than be tall and write on this shitty blog.

Oh and this.










Weird Al talks about the Gaga Saga




So we've all heard Gaga's track Perform This Way, and by now most of you have probably seen the music video, but are you aware of the backstory - it's quite interesting.

You'll have to click HERE! and jump to youtube because stinky CBS has disabled embedding.



In other news....
Haven't seen Weird Al's movie UHF? well now you have no excuse, here it is!

Tongmasters, BBQ's and Thieves.

Here's a film some buddies showed me back when I was in film school,
In South Africa they call their Barbie's a Braai - and it's not hard to see from the video below, that the hierarchy is exactly the same in SA as it is in AUS.

South African Braai Etiquette (2006)



Australia has a rich history of drinking beer and flipping snags on the webber - but it still saddens me to this day, that local Brisbane film school QPIX funded an almost exact copy of this well recieved and very clever South African short film.

The Tongmaster (2008)


QPIX and filmmakers creatively involved with the making of The Tongmaster - you bring shame on your country. Theives.

Blink 182 has news





Remember these guys?
Call me a screaming, prepubescent teenaged girl - but, I'm a Blink-182 fan from way back.
They were pretty much the soundtrack to my high school years - then they announced an "indefinite hiatus" back in 2006. Lead guitarist Tom DeLonge went off and formed Angels And Airwaves and had a mildly successful run, while bass guitarist Mark Hoppus and drummer Travis Barker formed +44 


In 2009, much to everyones surprise, the band reformed and has since played only a handful of shows around the US - But it was fairly well known amongst Blink 182 fans that the trio had been working on an album.
Then, this morning, Mark Hoppus tweeted this


Now, i may be reading between the lines here - but Blink 182 was one of the biggest bands in the world in the mid to late 90's, so they have a LOT of international fans - and i know what bands tend to do when they release a new album.
world tour anyone?
I sure hope so.

Radio Soulwax - FINALLY!

#soulwax #radiosoulwax

You can now download the Radio Soulwax app for FREES!

GET THIS! GET THIS! GET THIS!

Below is from the Brothers in Ghent May 2011.

Hello and welcome to RADIO SOULWAX


WHAT is Radio Soulwax?


Ok, so it's a radio station, but not as you know it. For now, it's a growing collection of 24 one hour-long mixes with visuals that we are sharing with you for free, and hopefully it will become a platform for many more things to come. We call them mixes, but in reality they are more like musical films based on the record sleeves.

Every hour has a different musical and visual theme (always based on the covers), to eventually make for a varied day-long radio schedule that will remain online in a rotated and continuous loop.

Over the next few months we will be adding a new show every week, culminating in a 24-hour musical and visual 'experience'. Sorry, we couldn't think of a better word than experience.

We have no idea how you will experience this, though, whether it will be too intense or too much to take in, or perhaps not enough. All we know is that we love it and had to do it, even though everyone called us crazy.

We spent ages trying to get everything to sound, look and feel right. We hope you appreciate this labour of love as it has taken a ridiculous amount of work.



WHY is Radio Soulwax?


Instead of releasing another 2manydjs mix album, we've tried to come up with something different, a new way to share music we love with you. Besides, we had too many ideas to put into one compilation and too many records to not do something more, something outrageous!

Music is everywhere today and everyone has the tools to be a musician and to be a DJ, but for us as music lovers, that hasn't necessarily resulted in an equally massive explosion of mindblowing new music, so we have decided to go back to all the great little gems we have found over the years, basically a free trip through our ever expanding record collection, into the many boxes we've carried back from record stores in our hometown, or shipped back from all corners of the world.

We're not trying to show off with the rarest holiest of grails that only a handful of people have, but just want to share a bunch of records that you might not have heard yet, and hopefully inspire you to search for and discover them for yourselves.

We grew up surrounded by our dad's extensive record collection and many of our earliest memories are of record sleeves, so it only makes sense that we made this tribute to that forgotten art form, albeit in a very digital way.

What can we say? It seemed like a good idea at the time! We had no idea it was going to take us over 2 years (whilst at the same time touring all over the world) to get it right, and as time went by, we got sucked into it more and more...

 

http://a5.mzstatic.com/us/r1000/114/Purple/a3/12/dd/mzl.xpnskknm.320x480-75.jpg



WHERE is Radio Soulwax?

You can listen to (or watch) our continuous internet radio stream on our website, check the schedule to find out which hour airs when, or alternatively you can download our app so you can choose which show to listen to (even when not connected to the internet).

WHO is Radio Soulwax?

As you can imagine, we have put a lot of time, money and energy into this project. We've hired people to animate, to encode, to digitize, to scan record sleeves and had to pull a lot of favors everywhere.

It has almost bankrupted us, almost killed us, and estranged us from family and friends, but we had to do it.

We have credited everyone involved in specific hours on the respective rear sleeves, but there are a few people who have been with us for the long haul:

Art Direction : Fergadelic

Executive Producer: Glyn Peppiatt

All-round Musical Assistance: Stefaan Van Leuven

Vinyl Encoding : Remco Redant, Frederik De Witte, Leo Bruynoghe, Kurt Augustyns, Paul Chambers

App Design: JP Altier

Stay tuned, there will be weekly updates and stuff!!



Dave and Steph

iPhone / iPad and Android

or watch online at http://www.radiosoulwax.com/

http://a2.mzstatic.com/us/r1000/088/Purple/65/07/2b/mzl.llytpgas.320x480-75.jpg
New hours will be added every week!

Wednesday, June 29, 2011

#thisdroidhasabadmotivator

#CastleAwesome #StarWars

In the above photo, Kenny Baker can be clearly seen stealing and eating another droid's sandwich.
No wonder that droid had a bad motivator.

Is FCPX any good? Apple says: NOT YET


#FCPX

Apple have released a FAQ which answers either Yes, or Not Yet to every "Frequently Asked Question" apart from one.

You will never ever ever ever ever be able to import or open a project from Final Cut 7 or below into FCPX. This program is neither Backwards nor Forwards compatible. It is a brand new piece of software, which Apple claims to be missing over 50% of it's functionality.

Still funny how you can import iMovie projects.

So, here is my Question to you. Final Cut is Dead. A new piece of software is born. FCPX. What do you do?

Learn the new software?
Or go with a competitor, who isn't missing any of its internal workings?

Personally, I hope this problem just dies, so I don't feel obliged to keep posting shit about it.


Jon on Harrison



Jon Favreau (Director Iron Man, Zathura, Cowboys & Aliens - ACTOR - Elf and voiced a character in an episode of The Clone Wars [yuck]) & Harrison Ford (it's Harrison Ford) seem to get along just nicely and these interviews are delight to watch. It's also worth noting that Jon is a veteran interviewer  and he just seems to love doing this sort of thing.


(Before Watching) If you scroll down this page real fast it looks Jon and Harrison are rapping to each other.













My Favourite Englishman, Philip Bloom

@PhilipBloom @Brooksbot #PhilipBloom #CastleAwesome



This handsome gentleman is Philip Bloom, he's a POME, but we won't hold that against him.
He has built a reputation as one of the foremost authorities on cinematography with DSLR cameras, including TimeLapsing - and has the unique ability of helping even the most technically incompetent of beginners shoot some pretty cool stuff and have fun in the process, which is what it's all about.

Rumour also has it that he enjoys a good G&T and smells of freshly baked cinnamon buns...
... but I can't confirm that.
All I know is that I have had the pleasure of meeting him, and he is an absolute gentleman and has a genuine passion about what he does.

I would encourage all of you, if you have ever wanted to pick up a camera and shoot, but have no idea where to start - or even if you're pretty handy with the camera but want to learn more, read Philip Bloom's blog and check out his videos. Click HERE!

Adobe to World: I TOLD YOU SO

#FCPX #ADOBE @al_mooney

Adobe, you are in front. Just shut up and let FCPX die a horrible death. (Actually, that's not true, how bout you make premiere just a little better, closer to FCP 7). Instead, an arrogant and condescending statement has been released.

Here are a few pieces -

"But the most important thing I want to say to all the newly turning heads is simply this: Adobe is committed making a modern, powerful, useable, professional NLE. In fact, we’re developing harder and faster than ever before. We will continue updating and improving Premiere Pro with regular, timely releases. We’ll continue striving to improve performance, to offer the best native format support possible, and to make the pure experience of just editing – in the way that you’ve learnt to – as intuitive and creative as possible.

I expect that the more you experiment with Premiere Pro, the more you’ll tell us where you’d like it to go next. There will always be bumps on the learning curve with an application new to you, just as there will be things you didn’t have before and wonder how you lived without. I just want you to know that we’re listening to you, the editors, and we aim to continue building an application that you love and can rely on.

This is going to be fun."

Full blog found here

Shake to FCP: "OH HAI MARK"




#FCPX @ronbrinkmann

Does anyone remember the software Shake? It wasn't as big as FCP because it had a smaller boutique market, but nevertheless, it was the last professional Apple product that died a horrible death, then was discontinued, and now, a former Shake designer, is out and about, shooting his mouth off, as he should.


Ronald Brinkmann has probably been spouting shit since Apple removed Shake as a product in 2009, but no one cared, nor believed him, until now. Here is a portion of his blog post.


After the acquisition I remember sitting in a roomful of Hollywood VFX pros where Steve told everybody point-blank that we/Apple were going to focus on giving them powerful tools that were far more cost-effective than what they were accustomed to… but that the relationship between them and Apple wasn’t going to be something where they’d be driving product direction anymore. Didn’t go over particularly well, incidentally, but I don’t think that concerned Steve overmuch…

The full post can be found here

Cheap aerial shots.

This is an instructional video in how to get unique aerial shots for free.

R.I.P. Charlie Harper 2003 - 2011


The creators of Two and a Half Men are sending a strong message to Charlie Sheen. Not only are they making sure he can never return to the show, but they will live out their fantasy, as close as they can, without breaking the law.

Rest in Peace Charlie Harper. Although you had access to my house for 7 years, I never took the time to get to know you.

He was survived by a washed up actor who plays his Brother and a freaky fat kid who plays his nephew.

Sorry, What's the point?

So, it has recently come to my attention that we have quite a few people who read this blog and like to comment, so I'm putting this out to all of you.

Tell me, what is the fucking point, of this.


A 12TB RAID system with only 2 thunderbolt ports.

Before you get up my ass about this, this is a 12TB RAID system, that is only available through a single computer with a Thunderbolt port. So it is a 12TB external hard drive.

I completely understand that you could connect it to a new mac book, and then from another computer, connect to the mac book and file share from and to this 12TB system.... but that kind of defeats the purpose of the thunderbolt speeds right?

It does have 2 thunderbolt ports, which means two thunderbolt compatible systems can mount the raid system, but that still doesn't explain what they mean by "Great for Small business"... I guess it means, really really small business (1 - 2 employees) generating a massive amount of digital information.

So I think this is useless... You know what wouldn't be useless. A smaller, more portable hard drive that utilises the thunderbolt speeds.

Oh that's right, this company (the only company to have thunderbolt compatible products on the market) do not make any external storage system less than a 4tb RAID system.

Thanks Fuckers.

FCP 7 vs FCP X

#FCPX #FCP7

This also made me laugh. A little parody of the PC vs Mac ad.



And a parody of the Social Network trailer.

Apple issuing refunds for FCPX

Coming straight off the back of the news that Taiwaneese law now states that Apple must offer a 7-day money back guarantee on ALL apps purchased through the apple store, it has come to my attention that refunds are being issued for FCPX all around the world, even though Apple has a blanket return and refund policy.

This is a no-brainer, which could've resulted in a massive revolt against the Apple corporation is they refused to acknowledge the obvious short comings of this software.

Here is the letter that confirms refunds are being handed out -

"Moving forward, I understand that you are not satisfied with the app "Final Cut Pro". I can certainly appreciate you would like a refund, and I would be more than happy to help you out with this today. In five to seven business days, a credit of £179.99 should be posted to the credit card that appears on the receipt for that purchase.

Please note that this is a one time exception because the iTunes Terms and Conditions state that all sales are final."

Hitler finds out about Final Cut Pro X

#Hitler #FCPX

So as a follow up to brooksbots post about FCPX the other day, heres how hitler took the news.

Tuesday, June 28, 2011

Rage

#Rage #Blakegriffin

You have probably all heard of id Softwares (Doom, Quake and Wolfenstein) new game Rage by now. but i still thought it was appropriate to share this. Probably the best way i've ever seen to advertise a game. Check it out.

It's important to note that this game has been built from the ground up, an entirely new platform designed to run at 60hz across all systems. It looks schmick.



This game starts to interest me more and more.

Volkswagon makes better fake products than cars.

Monday, June 27, 2011

How To Piss in Public.

#pissinginpublic

This is for our co-founder Matronomy. He has had trouble with this in the past. So here are a few hints and tips on how to avoid being caught next time buddy.

Why Sia is awesome.


It's not hard to see why all of us here at CastleAwesome.com have bee huge fans of Sia for a long time now.
Yes she has an amazing voice,
Yes she makes pop-funk music you can groove to.
Yes she is a queer-bot pocket rocket of awesome who just tweeted a vagina she made out of wool.

Why FCPX is a four letter word.

When Final Cut Pro X was first announced, everybody that is running FCP loved the fact that there was finally going to be Background Rendering (about time!) and support for 64bit processors (about time!) and a few other exciting little improvements, not least of all the software is downloadable from the App store and a drastic reduction in price of nearly $1,000.

Basically, since the first generation of Final Cut Pro was first unveiled at NAB 1998, each new version of the software was just an upgrade, a patch, if you will, on the original software, which formed its foundation.
Final Cut Pro X, however, was completely rebuilt from the ground up.

Then the software hit the shelves last week.

Whilst a lot of people who only use the basic functions of FCP  loved it, it's essentially the lovechild of FCP and iMovie. it's a bastardised software that doesn't know what it wants to be.
There was a lot of public outrage, as Apple pulled FCP 7 and Studio 3 from the shelves, forcing people to purchase FCPX. And boy did Apple get slammed for it. There was so much negative feedback, in fact, that Apple deleted and disabled the comments on FCPX page of the AppStore.

Editing guru and post production expert Larry Jordan offers a high end post production take on the new software, and offers some friendly advise to Apple, saying that "damage control" is what they need to be focusing on now.

"When I first saw Final Cut X, I was excited by its potential, but warned Apple that this release would be intensely polarizing to the editing community. It does not give me pleasure to see that I was right."


"Worse, Apple has alienated the very people who can make a very visible statement as to the inadequacy of the program. No clearer example can be found than the public ridicule of FCP X on the Conan O’Brien show."


After the launch, Apple compounded their problems with three extremely poorly timed moves:
1. Canceling Final Cut Studio (3) and pulling all existing product from the market. This is devastating to shops that can’t use Final Cut Pro X. The two applications can co-exist on the same system — killing FCP 7 will not boost sales of FCP X to those shops that can’t run it. All it does is set up a black market for FCP 7.


2. Not providing – then publicly stating (thru David Pogue’s New York Times blog) that they do not plan to provide – a conversion utility from FCP 7 to FCP X. Not only does this render a HUGE number of past projects inaccessible, it sets up the obvious conclusion that if Apple is willing to discontinue support for legacy applications with no warning, what’s to prevent them from doing so again in the future? Every time you watch a movie that is more than 6 months old, you are dealing with legacy assets. Not providing a conversion utility is completely inexcusable.


3. Leaving the support for interchange formats – XML, EDL, OMF and others – to third-parties; or not supporting them at all. Yes, the video and film industry needs to move into the current century. However, Hollywood is very reluctant to change what works. Meeting deadlines is far more important than adopting new technology. Apple’s walled garden approach is totally at odds with the nature of post-production, where the editing system is the hub around which a wide variety of other applications revolve. On any editing project I routinely run 5-10 other programs simultaneously — only three of which are from Apple. I am constantly moving data between programs. This, combined with a lack of support for network-based storage, highlight grave development decisions in determining what features to include in the program.
"When I was talking with Apple prior to the launch, they told me that they extensively researched the market to determine what needed to be in the new program. In retrospect, I wonder what people they were talking with."






In FCP X, Apple got some things amazingly right. But they also got key features amazingly wrong. And if they don’t change course, this software, which has significant potential, is going to spin further and further out of control. At which point, its feature set is irrelevant, its reputation will be set. We’ll be looking at another Mac Cube.


Apple does not normally ever comment on future products – though they did this year, prior to WWDC, because they needed to reset expectations. Because of the visibility of this product into an audience that can cause extensive PR damage to Apple, I suggest that Apple break its usual vow of silence and do three things:
1. Immediately return Final Cut Studio (3) to the market. If it is not compatible with Lion (and I don’t know whether it is or not) label it so. But put it back on store shelves so consumers have the ability to work with the existing version until FCP X is ready for prime time.


2. Fund the development of a conversion utility – either at Apple or thru a 3rd-party – and announce the development with a tentative release date.


3. Publicly announce a road-map for FCP X that just covers the next 3-4 months. Apple needs to be in damage control mode and the best way to defuse the situation is to communicate. Answering the question: “What features will Apple add to FCP X, and when?” will go a long way to calming people down.

Sunday, June 26, 2011

The end of an era.



I know i wasn't alone when i said i was a little bummed out that Pixar's film for the year was Cars 2.
& to prove the well trained eyes of avid cinema lovers can see a flop coming a mile away, Pixar has recieved a kick in the pants with this shitty sequal recieving Pixar's first ever 'Rotten' rating on RottenTomatoes.com


At the time of writing, Cars 2 was sitting on a woeful 33%

Now, the thing to take into account is that Pixar is now no longer the biggest kid on the jungle gym, with Industrial Light & Magic (ILM) showing that they are not just the undisputed gods of VFX, but now, after Rango, they are more than capable of knocking Pixar off their perch.


so, in 2011, Cars 2 (pixar) vs Rango (ILM) ??

...Rango wins.

Pixar has had a long standing reputation of making some of the most incredible animated films ever made, and they had better come up with something earth-shatteringly good if they want to hold onto that reputation.

Unlistenable.

"I'm an old fuck" was Mr. Oizo's reaction to the realisation that it has been 7 years since the release of Stunt.

as a tribute, he has posted the iconic music video onto his vimeo account.
enjoy.


MR OIZO / STUNT from oizo mr on Vimeo.

IMPORTANT NOTICE


All of us here at CastleAwesome.com are proud to announce that we are a Richard Wilkins free zone.

Morning paper nostalgia

Many of us are old enough to be able to remember that distinct smell from our childhood of fresh newspapers from that convenience store up the road, where your old man would give you a two dollar coin and send you to get the Sunday paper.

To show that the New York Times has a sense of humour about the demise of printed news, a tradition that dates back to the early 17th century, It has released a newspaper scented candle that you can light when reading the morning news on your iPad.



EDIT: These candles are now for sale, but who the fuck would buy one given they retail for $65 each.

Daisy, Daisy give me your answer do. I'm half crazy all for the love of you.


Finally, i can command technology without a stupid keyboard.
Did you see Dave having to type out every command whenever he wanted to talk to his HAL9000 computer? no, of course not - like that movie needed to be any longer.

The future is here, and all you need is a soldering iron and a steady hand.


Queens Birthday Weekend

If you are reading this post, you probably didn't relaise that today is a public holiday. Today is Queens Birthday. Not the Queen of England you twat. The Queen of Castle Awesome. Happy Birthday Hicksbot. Above is a photo for you. I super imposed the crown and royal staff into the pic. I hope you like it.

Happy Birthday!

Now go eat some Royal Fucking Pudding.

A 21st century take on an old and silly american tradition.


Friday, June 24, 2011

My Favourite Sebastians

SeabastiAN


Sebastian Shaw (Real Person)

Sebastian Shaw (Fictional Character)

Sebastien Tellier (Real and Fictional)

Sebastian Love (Prime minister of Britain)

Sebastian Szwajczak (Photographer )

Sebastian (Crab)


Guy Sebastian (Fag)

Pon De Floor

#MajorLazer #Ericwareheim

How have i never seen this before? Plus it's directed by Eric from Tim and Eric Awesome show.

Great Job!



Major Lazer - Pon De Floor feat... by maddecent

Whisker Wars

#Whiskerwars

My New favourite TV show.



I will be watching this. I will be grooming my beard. I will be a happy mother fucker with a beard.

Some of my favourite bearded people.







Did i forget anyone? Who's your favourite bearded person?

Thursday, June 23, 2011

You Should Be Watching This.

I know we said this already but the last episode (Ep. 3) has a special appearance of Tim & Eric.


Like.

Dear bosses of the world.
now you're fucked.



Ever wanted to waste time at work by trawling through facebook, but you're too afraid of getting caught? well fear no more.
Some genius has just designed a facebook plug-in that makes facebook look like an excel spreadsheet.

Now watch as your companies productivity plummets.

Wednesday, June 22, 2011

Germans.


Because Germans still haven't actually made a comedian robot called FunnyBot,
They are still regarded as the least funny people on the planet.
I disagree, because Hitler was Austrian.

Here are some German jokes as told by one of my old favorites Engraved Paint




What's worse then finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust.


A man walks into a pub. He is an alcoholic whose drink problem is destroying his family


Did you hear about the blonde who jumped out off a bridge? She was clinically depressed and took her own life because of her terribly low self-esteem


How many electricians does it take to change a light bulb? One.


Why do women fake orgasms? Because they want to give men the impression that they have climaxed.


Two cows are in a field. Suddenly, from behind a bush, a rabbit leaps out and runs away. One cow looks round a bit, eats some grass and then wanders off.


A black man is going to get a vasectomy. He shows up to the doctor's office wearing a suit. The doctor says, "Why are you wearing a suit?" The black man says, "I just got back from a funeral"


A kid is riding down the street when his chain pops off his bicycle. The kid yells "God damn!" as he begins to fix it. A priest walking nearby overhears the boy taking god's name in vein and says "Don't say 'God damn' say 'God help us'". The kid says, "I am an atheist, get away from me".


A blonde girl walks into the local dry cleaners. She places a garment on the counter. "I'll be back tomorrow afternoon to pick up my dress." she says. "Come again?" says the clerk, cupping his ear. "I said 'I'LL BE BACK TOMORROW AFTERNOON TO PICK UP MY DRESS'," says the girl, this time louder.


A horse walks into a bar. The barman immediately calls the local stable to report the missing stallion, and his owner promptly arrives to take him home. He thanks the landlord and offers a small reward, but it is respectfully declined.

Dammit.



One of Australia's most popular website hosting companies, Distribut.IT got hacked big time on the weekend.
Reports say that no less that 4 of the companies servers got trashed beyond saving - and as a result, nearly 5,000 websites are currently down.

here's the kicker.

Distribut.IT has admitted that it did not back-up any of the data at an off-site location.
aaaaaaaaaaannndd it's GONE!

Courtney Stodden. Your Redneck American Girl.

#CourtneyStodden #Doughutchison

So Horace from Lost


recently married this 16 year old beauty Queen. Even more spooky the flower girl was 4, the bridesmaids 8 and 15, and the best men 23 and 42... (as provided by wil anderson)

This is her spectacular video. Totally blitzes Rebecca Black, plus i just love the background, Sitting in a fancy boat singing about how shes gonna steal your man away in the middle of redneck country. If thats not genius, i don't know what is.



Also this. I know that last video was awful, but this is worse. watch it. seriously. This video might save a life. Shes an "inspiring" actress. god i want to be like her so much!

Castle Beats

Go to Beatport.comGet These TracksAdd This Player