Wednesday, June 22, 2011

Germans.


Because Germans still haven't actually made a comedian robot called FunnyBot,
They are still regarded as the least funny people on the planet.
I disagree, because Hitler was Austrian.

Here are some German jokes as told by one of my old favorites Engraved Paint




What's worse then finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust.


A man walks into a pub. He is an alcoholic whose drink problem is destroying his family


Did you hear about the blonde who jumped out off a bridge? She was clinically depressed and took her own life because of her terribly low self-esteem


How many electricians does it take to change a light bulb? One.


Why do women fake orgasms? Because they want to give men the impression that they have climaxed.


Two cows are in a field. Suddenly, from behind a bush, a rabbit leaps out and runs away. One cow looks round a bit, eats some grass and then wanders off.


A black man is going to get a vasectomy. He shows up to the doctor's office wearing a suit. The doctor says, "Why are you wearing a suit?" The black man says, "I just got back from a funeral"


A kid is riding down the street when his chain pops off his bicycle. The kid yells "God damn!" as he begins to fix it. A priest walking nearby overhears the boy taking god's name in vein and says "Don't say 'God damn' say 'God help us'". The kid says, "I am an atheist, get away from me".


A blonde girl walks into the local dry cleaners. She places a garment on the counter. "I'll be back tomorrow afternoon to pick up my dress." she says. "Come again?" says the clerk, cupping his ear. "I said 'I'LL BE BACK TOMORROW AFTERNOON TO PICK UP MY DRESS'," says the girl, this time louder.


A horse walks into a bar. The barman immediately calls the local stable to report the missing stallion, and his owner promptly arrives to take him home. He thanks the landlord and offers a small reward, but it is respectfully declined.

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